Project 143?

I know. I know. I said I was going to be dedicated to my blog this time and what happened? 
It all fell apart a month ago. 
I think I might have commitment issues.

That or the life I have been documenting sort of took precedent over blogging about it.

I would love to share everything that I am dealing with right now, and wow, there is a lot. 
But in order to protect the innocent and/or unsuspecting players in my life, I think I will keep some things where they belong, in my own thoughts.

It could also be that I am extremely lazy and cooking, cleaning, and caring for two somewhat feral children is about all I can fit on my plate right now.

Maybe I need a vacation.

Or maybe I just have a short attention span.

Who knows.

I do miss it.

Even if I only blog about a tenth of the stuff floating around in my head, I feel better.

I think I might need to write to feel whole even.

I know that probably sounds crazy to some people.
Looking back I realize that I have been writing at least a few paragraphs of something every few days, since I was eight years old.
That's a lot of rambling.

I think it might be how artists feel when they don't paint or draw for a time.

As trivial as what I am writing about appears the process of writing anything at all is what I crave.

I actually have been feeling less whole since I stopped writing and I have been visiting my blog like a tourist visits their favorite city.

I keep waiting to be inspired but I think I am going about it all wrong.

I have pigeonholed myself into this neat little blog that is not really me.

I am not neat and perfect and organized and writing that way feels contrived.

And really, do people actually care if I bought five boxes of cereal for $2?

I have been boring myself.

Honestly, I don't need any more bullshit in my life so I am dropping my Project 365.

I am going to recommit to writing here whether or not anyone reads it but me.

My writing has really always been about me and for me so I am going to stick to that and see where it leads me.
Hopefully, I can be honest with myself.

I might post every day or I might only post once a month.
But there's no telling what could come out of my head.

Follow at your own risk.